I broke my Q maiden at the posh today. I’m always trying to impress Zoo and I like to humor the PAX, so I decided to dress up as a 1970’s football coach. HAT: generic trucker, grey mesh, white background, with black COACH lettering, worn high with a Carhartt insulated hat underneath. FACE: a freshly shaved mustache, no beard. NECKLACE: every coach needs a basic whistle, so this accessory added to the humor and functionality of the Q experience. TOP: generic, 100% Cotton navy extra tight short sleeve T-shirt, with white COACH lettering across the front; the shirt was tucked into my running shorts for ‘70s fashion authenticity. BOTTOMS: Nike, navy 100% polyester running shorts, made in America, circa 1970s, with an inseam <2 inches. These eBay nut huggers got real uncomfortable during the burpees, and at $22, they’re a heck of a lot cheaper than a vasectomy. SOCKS: white, calf-high cotton tube socks with 3 blue stripes, a classic ‘70s look. The outfit was rounded out with the requisite running kicks and gloves.
WEATHER: cold, not much wind, about 20 degrees.
PAX 19: Abacus, Bob Ross, Steamer, Mr Hat, Slipper (FNG), Gillespie, Catfish (FNG), Bat Boy (FNG), Plethora, Glaucoma, Star Child, Boozer, Methane, Peakaboo, Rythm, Gypsy, Stormtrooper, Cardinal, and Pope.
Thang 1 – ploymetrics, hill sprints, and core work
We moseyed over from the flag to the bridge. Forty yards off the apex of the bridge, 2 Halloween pumpkins (in lieu of cones), 1 on each side of the bridge, marked our starting lines. We split the PAX into 2 groups. We did 3 broad jumps from the starting line, and then sprinted to the top of the bridge. We immediately transitioned into 20 reps of wall dips, LBCs, and flutter kicks. We repeated this hill work 11 times. I like to visualize numbers and record progress, so the math equates to 440 yards of uphill sprinting (including 33 broad jumps), 220 wall dips, 220 LBCs, and 220 flutter kicks, and 440 yards of downhill jogging.
Thang 2 – 10 minute burpee test, targeting 100 reps
We moseyed over from the bridge to the lightly frosted egg lawn. It was begging for some heat and the PAX brought it and then some. We targeted 10 burpees each minute for 10 consecutive minutes. QIC counted off each set of 10, which took about 30 seconds to complete. Some ambitious HIMs may have completed more than 100. Some men likely found their limits and possibly came up a little short. No matter. Each man took away a tangible number for himself, a yardstick for his fitness level, which he should be damn proud of. I’m not sure if we’ve done a 10 minute burpee test before, but I encourage the group to pick this up again, as each man now has a number in his mind that he will beat the next time he’s tested. That’s what I call #Getbetter. I look forward to hearing about your 10 minute burpee progress in the future.
Thang 3 – ploymetrics and weights
We moseyed about a half mile over to the under pass for coupon / rock work and some fast feet exercises. We each selected a rock weighing anywhere from 40-60 pounds (at least that’s what I saw) and set them on the ground. Standing with one foot on each side of the rock, we jumped back and forth over the rock 30 times, bouncing off the balls of our feet and touching the balls of our feet with our hands on each rep. An Argintinian aerobics instructor showed me this exercise years ago, and I’ve always liked it. She called it the “heisman.” I think her nomenclature is somewhat misleading, but we’ll refer to it as that while lacking a better substitute. We then quickly transitioned to 10 rock derkins, 10 overhead rock presses with a lunge in between each press (like a thruster), and 10 rock curls. We rinsed and repeated this 4 times, totaling 120 heismans, 40 derkins, 40 overhead lunge presses, and 40 curls.
Thang 4 – 4 minutes of elbow planking
We moseyed another half mile back to the flag. Star child and abacus own this place and picked up the six at various points. Stormtrooper Larry Birded the whole WO. I enjoyed a nice chat with Bob Ross on the jog back and it reminded me how much I’ve been missing the posh. We circled up, no man left behind, and dug in for 4 minutes of continuous elbow planking on the poshy concrete. Jokes and stories abounded, with Methane taking the brunt and jabbing back in good humor. Some may have not made it the whole 4 minutes, but no worries. QIC called out time at 30 second intervals and each man now has another marker in his head, on how far he went today before failure. I know all the PAX stayed in the fight for the full 4 minutes of gut check. There wasn’t a quitter in the bunch.
Gillespie pulled 2 solid FNGs today, Slipper and Catfish. I’ll take partial credit for headlocking another stud FNG today, Bat Boy. 3 FNGs is amazing in 20 degree weather. Welcome – we want you back for more! We were running over on time so we skipped the sixth. We prayed for a family that lost a young man in a local shooting last night and we prayed for each other.
Gillespie confidently spoke of another key FNG he’s working on, which could pull our group into an entirely new circle of individuals. I’m pleased to report that the expansion pipeline is fighting off seasonality, and is now more robust than expected.
It was an honor to be YHC (your head coach) today.