1.4.23 Back Blast: The Range @ The Patriot

My man Swag has done a stellar job as site Q at The Range. Prior to 2.2.22 he was one of the cornerstones at The Patriot, posting nearly every possible day. When it came time at the end of January ‘22 to promote Wednesday’s black ops to a regularly scheduled AO, the Site Q of The Range would be a no brainer. In this past year he has done so many good things to accelerate the betterment of HIM and sad clowns. One thing in particular was taking lead on making patches and giving public recognition to those that celebrated a landmark post count. Man! Talk about engagement and giving newer guys something to shoot for! When he asked me to take a date to Q, it was also a no brainer.

Now…on this day, I had experienced alarm clock malfunctions, rolling over in the fart sack glancing over with the only eye that seemed to work and discovered it was 0512. Expletive!! It takes me a good 20 minutes to get to The Patriot so even though my gear was set out the night before, I was inevitably going to be late. En route like a bat outta hell, I shot Swag a quick DM letting him know of my current situation. In record time, as I pull up past the statue at about normal Mutt start time, I found the guys circling up from a warmup mosey around the block. I let them finish their grass grabbers before announcing that I was present and clearly not a professional. LET’s MOSEY! Jolly Rancher would exclaim, “we already did that Bird!” Thankfully 20 other PAX would follow, so Jolly would have to also.

The PAX: Yankovic (Rx2), Ruby (R), Holy Roller(Rx2), Patty, Virginia Slims, Porto Bucket, Scammer, Rip VanWinkle, Snaggletooth, Kingsman, Malpractice, Mannequin, Swag, Chili Pepper, SQL, Layover, Single Source, Colonel Klink, Saul Goodman, Jolly Rancher, Furdays, BigBird (Q)

We would mosey down to the licka sto, across the block, up heartbreak hill and would end at the F3 pavilion. We stopped momentarily before getting in 3 rounds of 1 minute imaginary jump ropes (one PAX was caught doing jazz hands – you know who you are…), 10 Merkins and 15 Bobby Hurleys.

Recover and give instruction on The Thang: 3 rounds of 10 box jumps, 15 burpees, mosey to the parking lot, lunge walk from one side to the other and Bernie Sanders back. Some finished sooner than others but they knew the deal and got in some EC to pick up “the 6” so we could all finish together.

The Final Thang: mini Jack Webb of Captain Thor. 1 BBSU to a 2 count American Hammer. We would get to 7 & 28 before having us recover back to the flags. I had to leave time for…

The Song: As advertised in the pre blast, January 4th was National Spaghetti Day. And Yankovic would never let me hear the end of it if I didn’t incorporate spaghetti in some form or fashion. So, with the 90 seconds that would remain I had us circle up so that Col William Oldham could be serenaded by the sounds of a song titled, “Ready 4 Spaghetti.” We would hold plank for the short duration of the song and drop for a Merkin every time we heard “spaghetti.” It ended up only being 14 Merkins but the tough part was enduring the song…0615 and time was called.

Stayed circled up for COR, NOR & COT. Made some announcements and lifted up our intentions. I thanked the Sky Q for the prospect of another day and for this special group of men.

Until next time…


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