Q: Captain Insane-o
Pax (20): Jordy, Plethora, Zoolander, Zima, Digiorno, Piggy, Gepetto, Fridge, Glenn Ross (milkshake), Cardinal, Left Eye, Wedding Singer, Spinal Tap (Enya), Mouth, Busssccccchhh, McAfee, Donut (yesterday’s FNG; BOOM), Donger (knows every DJ Kahlid and Mumble Rap song on the planet), Butcher (Slack guilt works folks), CI (YHC)
Conditions: 69* (stop), muggy like Cambodia. Felt like you were working out in a damp asbestos oven mitt. So nasty that we all took turns drinking my backwash after the workout. Sorry not sorry. I pretty much saved lives with that backwash.
Gearlander: Nike shorts (with the liner Glauc), Spiderman dri-fit tshirt, Features socks, Trail Newbies, gloves.
*not pictured, the eleventy million coupons used onsite.
For those of you following along, we’re growing. And according to the WeaselShaker9000 (the semi-sentient robot Tron built) Tuesday is our most popular day to post. So we started the Carpenter at Joe Creason, hoping to relieve some pressure from Bag of Wrenches at the O and to HL guys in the Highlands. Kind of working. And we added a Black Op at a local church called Sojourn off Rudy Lane to relieve the Rooster at the Mutt. It’s two minutes from the Mutt. This has been happening for the past couple, three weeks. (We’ve also added additional workouts on Tuesday; hell, we had 5 today. Woof).
The concept behind this BO at Sojourn would be no running, all heavy work. This had some appeal since guys are losing weight so fast folks think they have a tape worm. Plus, pools open this weekend and we need to get those beach muscles fired up. YHC hasn’t been able to partake because of Site Q duties at the Carp, though.
But Zartan, being the peach he is, said he’d switch me and site Q the Carp today, so I could check out (and Q) at Sojourn. Just so happens I have a basement full of heavy shit, and Sojourn is literally six minutes from my house. Also, I had some liquid courage that helped me decide what I’d bring with me, and after lugging it all up the steps into my rig, I was ready to G.O., go.
But what I wasn’t ready for was a Pax of 20. That’s what I got though.
Let me set the scene. Today is an election day in Kentucky, and Sojourn is a polling place. So it was decked out in red, white and blue; Zoo thought I had done the decorating myself. He even thought I planted a shovel flag in the concrete. Maybe I did. When I pulled in, there was a car backing out and turning around. And there was Piggy in his badass Renegade. Turns out McAfee and Donut (yesterday’s FNG, today’s stud. Well, he was a stud yesterday, too.) were a little shaky on the start spot, but once they saw me, they pulled in and remarked how incredibly convenient this location was. “I know,” I thought. 6 minutes from my house. But I couldn’t dwell too long. I had 300 pounds of crap to unload to set into stations.
As I dropped instructions and moved stuff into place, more guys arrived. I was getting a little nervous. My plan was max 10 Pax; that’s consistent with historical numbers. Plus, I sent out the picture of all this crap. Surely no one wanted part of this little tickle fight. Boy, was I wrong.
Apparently today is ride your bike to the workout day in F3 Louisville. Total aside, can you imagine my dumbass riding down Hwy 42 with all the crap pictured above on my Huffy? Now, that’s a funny mental image. Back to this morning and reality. As I set the final coupons down, I looked up to see Glenn Ross, Wedding Singer, Left Eye, Gepetto, Zoolander, Fridge, a guy on a unicycle and a guy on one of those old timey bikes with a big-assed wheel on the front roll in (may have been more and if so, I apologize. At this point I was internally freaking out). But, as Glenn Ross noted, this ain’t my first rodeo and this ain’t splitting atoms. We’d be fine. Plus, it was awesome that Glenn Ross’s milkshake is so strong.
I gave a disclaimer, which encouraged Pax to modify or ask about form (I heard you, Zima, giving good tips; good on ya). Then, we WALKED (no running; I’m a man of my word) a couple of feet to circle up as I Glauc’d my phone and bluetooth speaker. Ahh, connected; time to work. Here’s what we did:
SSHs 20 IC
Copperhead Squats 15 IC
Grass Grabbers 15 IC
Abe Vigodas 15 IC
Sufficiently warm (I was dripping sweat already), we counted off. 20. Perfect. I added a minute to my Tabata, everyone paired up, and we were off like a prom dress.
A modified Death Circuit. For 2 minutes, partners burn out on AMRAP of the station and switcharoo; 20 seconds of rest. The stations were, as follows (yes, they’re not in order, but whatevs):
R1: HACK SQUAT (FAT VAL)
R2: DEADLIFT (FAT VAL)
R1: ALTERNATING ARM WAVES (ROPES)
R2: DOUBLE ARM WAVES (ROPES)
From ropes, bear crawl to Lil Val Station
R1: SHOULDER TO SHOULDER PRESS (LIL VAL)
R2: CURLS (LIL VAL)
R1: TWO HAND OVERHEAD PRESS (30LB KBS)
R2: TWO (ONE) HAND SWINGS (30 LB KBS)
R1: FORWARD CHEST PRESS (50LB KB)
R2: BENCH PRESS (50LB KB)
R1: FARMER’S CARRY (2 COUPONS)
R1: DIPS (2 COUPONS)
R2: ABYSS MERKINS (2 COUPONS)
R1: CLAP LUNGES
R2: ELBOW PLANK
R1: FLUTTER KICK
R2: BOX CUTTER
Ended right at 0615. Let me say this: this was hard. 20 seconds is not a rest. It’s a fart in the wind. This was a total you v. you workout, so it was up to you to burn yourself up. Pretty sure Busch (my pards) and I did that. At one point, I thought I was going to vomit (after the bear crawl, into curls, after the ropes). Busch said he had a mouth full of cotton and couldn’t swallow. So, you know it was gooooooood.
Let me say this, as well: this was a great 2nd F opportunity. Zoo chastised me for not splitting pards into unknowns, but I was so flabbergasted by the Pax number, I didn’t think that far ahead. That said — and aside from Busch saying I didn’t talk at all — most teams had some pretty good chatter going on. I like this a lot. The 2nd F is the glue.
Anyway, good day today. Lots of fun had by all. I’d like to come back to Sojourn sometime and do some pull-ups. But back to the Carp next week, which is cool. I like to get around like a record. And that’s my challenge to you, dear reader: get around; try new spots; meet new guys. Go outside your comfort zone. Q, Q again, call a Happy Hour or lunch. THIS IS A LEADERSHIP GROUP, AND YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE A LEADER.
COR, NOR. Announcements include all the upcoming Qs; check the website calendar or Slack. The Ruck Event this Friday Qdre’d by OJ and Wham! is going to be fun (I’m sad to miss it). Many intentions, including for one of our own and the son of one of our newest Pax. BOM where I took us out with some words. Hopefully this morning was the hardest thing you’ll do all day. But if not, I have faith you’ll make it through. I’ve seen how hard you all work.