Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays.
So much food – and it’s one of the only times where the food can actually touch when it is on my plate. Given it was Thanksgiving, I decided to give the PAX a little buffet to get them going.
- Bulletin (R)
- Holy Roller (R)
- Captain Crunchberry
- Uber (FNG)
- Colonel Klink
- Big Bird
- Brown Water
- Supersoaker (2.0)
- Squirt Gun (2.0)
- Fun Dip (2.0)
- Honey Do
- Jolly Rancher (Q)
Time was called and disclaimers were provided. We picked up our coupons and made our way back towards the ballfields. Instead of a mosey, we did a rifle carry with our coupons for 100 yards or so. Then, we lunged walked about 50 yards or so and then another rifle carry for 100 yards. Then finished the trip with a mosey.
- Grass Grabbers
- Downward Dog + Runners Stretches
- Don’t remember anything else…but I’m sure we did something.
The Thang – Thanksgiving Buffet – Jolly Rancher Style:
First, we counted off. Then I told the PAX that we’d be enjoying the feast I had behind me on the picnic table. I had twelve plates, each one of them full of all your favorite Thanksgiving fixins’. Okay, no not really – it was pieces of paper with that food on them at least. I went all out, too – used the M’s laminator and slaved away with a paper cutter all night long. It felt like I was cooking.
So, the goal was I sent the odd number PAX around the baseball field for a lap. And told the even numbered PAX to line up and go down the buffet line to grab whatever food items they wanted for Thanksgiving. You want two helpings of turkey? Go for it. You want three doses of pumpkin pie? You do you, brother. I had to call foul on Brown Water and Focker who tried to cut line – just like they did at grandma’s house later that day. Once the evens made their way through the line the odds were back and filed right on in behind them to do the same.
I then had strategically and appropriately socially distanced place away of Jolly Rancher’s Thanksgiving Day Menu which actually showed you what it costs you to eat that turkey, or that pumpkin pie. Here’s what the punishment was:
- Turkey – Lap around the ball field
- Ham – 25 merkins
- Mashed Potatoes – 25 manmakers
- Gravy – 25 goiners – 4 count
- Green Bean Casserole – 25 plank jacks – 4 count
- Bread Roll – 25 big boy situps
- Sweet Potato Casserole – 25 lunges – 4 count
- Cranberries – 25 squats
- Stuffing – 25 curls
- Mac & Cheese – 25 dips
- Apple Pie – 25 box jumps / step ups
- Pumpkin Pie – 25 coupon swings
For those that got done with their first helping, I made sure to tell the PAX that leftovers don’t get eaten at my house – which means we had to eat the whole buffet. So, they should just help themselves with a second, third or fourth helping if they wanted it.
Things were going pretty good in the beginning. The PAX were clearly enjoying the feast. Uber, our FNG, decided that he only wanted a thing of turkey, mac and cheese and a bread roll on this first plate. He eats like my 2.0s. I at least had SOME color on my plate.
Meanwhile, every time I looked over at Holy Roller he has his face down in his plate of mashed potatoes. The man must not have eaten dinner the night before. He was stuffing himself. At one point when the buffet was almost over, he was still going at those mashed potatoes. I asked him how many he had and he said 175 and he had to go to 200. It took me a minute for that to register, but I then yelled at some PAX around him so we split up the last 25. Beastmode…even at a buffet.
We then grabbed the coupons and set out back towards the flag.
We did some quick Mary, which consisted of gas pumps and flutter kicks. Time was then called.
We circled around the flag for countarama, namearama, naming our FNG, announcements and intentions. We named our FNG Uber because he drives for Lyft. Love it.
I truly love Thanksgiving. It’s a day to celebrate and be together with family and friends. It’s a day to remember and truly remind yourself how blessed you truly are. Most men don’t have what we have. We have able bodies that can carry on with the abuse that we put it through. We have the minds that know the difference between right or wrong. We have the support system of each other that helps push us to be better men. But, what most of us may be missing is a loved one this year – perhaps for the first time. Perhaps not even because of COVID, but because of death. And, that’s never easy. But, being with this group of men each and every day makes that pain a little easier to swallow.
I’m thankful for each and every one of you.
Jolly Rancher out!